10 blessings I learnt about life…

1. Let God be the centre of your life, He isn’t going simply be there without you saying or asking him, God unlike use is polite, gentle and well-mannered. Invite God in all you do and he shall be there.

2. No one and I mean no one is perfect. We might think that perfection it the place we want to reach but think about the time it took to reach perfection… we aren’t here to be perfect, we are here to make progress, improve ourselves and move on to bigger and better things.

3. It’s not about when or how you start or even end because that’s just it, it’s a beginning and end. What matters is the manner in which you carry yourself throughout the process, the small failures that could have made you give up and the small triumphs that give you hope, those are the important moments that define one’s character.

4. It has been said multiple times… “Life is a choice, you CHOOSE how to live it, you CHOOSE what you learn from it and you CHOOSE how it makes you better worse.”  Make  the choice already decide what it is you want and do it.

5. “Many are called, but  few are chosen.” Ask yourself what it is that sets apart people who were never from the people  who were called and the people who were called from the people who were chosen… EFFORT you can know it all and still not be called, you can be prepared and still not be chosen. Effort set you apart from everyone what you put in is exactly what you get out so whether you know or not put in the EFFORT and it will pay off.

6. Second chances are given to you in an abundance. If you are able to wake up whether you are hooked on machines or not the fact that you are able to wake up means you have another chance do things right, another chance to fight for what you want…. use that chance you get when you wake up.

7. Experts were once beginners also  don’t shy away from learner from those more experienced than you, you could be teaching them something in the process too….

8. Take your time, goals are never reached in one day. Allow yourself to go through the necessary changes, prepare yourself for what’s about to happen…. your time will come.

9. People don’t need to know about everything you do, you don’t know who’s pray for you and who’s praying against you. Keep QUIET and do you, the time for you to share things will come.

10. God is the be all and end all, the Alpha and Omega. Learn to trust His  timing it is always perfect.

If you had to leave 10 blessings you learnt about life what would yours be?

It’s the life we live…

You’ve had your heart broken.

You’ve had your life torn apart.

You lost everything.

You lost everyone.

Your entire being was turned upside down 

Through it all you held your head up high and kept going.

You tried to pick up the pieces

You tried to put it back together 

You looked for everything 

You searched for everyone 

You entire being is still stuck in turmoil

Through it all you realised, “fuck it”

Your heart got broken, yes… And it isn’t the the first nor the last there’s nothing special or different about the ex, the didn’t realise that they had a gold mine on their hands so forget about it.

Your life is torn apart, so what? Has there ever been a life that’s all in one piece, I don’t think so, so gather all the pieces and ensure they are all in one place I mean you don’t need your shit all over the place right…

You lost everything… Maybe you weren’t suppose to have it. Look at it this way stop focusing on what you have and start looking at what you can do its not like you going to be buried with your things once you dead.

You lost everyone… No no no! Everyone lost you, they couldn’t handle awesomeness so find people who can, you’re not gonna be everyone’s cup of tea.

Your entire being is turned upside down and… Who know which way is the right way up even your being could be positioned the right way the only thing you should worry about is your entire being being at peace through all the turmoil. 

Screw everything, keep your head up, own your throne and grow your Kingdom that’s all that matters 

Throw it away 

Starting all over is never easy but it is necessary and I don’t mean picking up the broken pieces and putting them back together. A fresh start means taking the dustpan sweeping up all the pieces even the ones that look like you can fix and throwing it all away in the dustbin. Reason why specifically say “throw it all away in the dust” is because we tend to hold on to things unnecessarily, yes we want a fresh start but the thought of starting everything all over or even letting go of old grudges and emotions creates this fear of, “what will I fill this space with now?” We somehow create this panic within ourselves where it seem like if we get rid of these pieces we instantly lose our identities, we simply don’t know who we are without these pieces. Or better yet we are able sweep up the pieces but we throw it under the rug…. That still does nothing you because you might say you got rid of it but you know where that extra junk in your trunk comes from sad part is it ways you down. That dirt under the rug is like being in a toxic relationship you know you have to get out because you deserve better of but you don’t want to and it ends up damaging you way beyond repair or worse it kills you all because of that fear of stepping out on your own and starting a fresh. But here’s the worst of the bunch the ones who sweep up everything and I mean everything make their way to the dustbin but don’t get rid of the dirt or they do get rid of it but the won’t leave…. I don’t know how but there is a sense of guilt that falls upon us at this point where it seem like we seem to be betraying ourselves by throwing away the very same pieces that were once part of us, how do you just throw such away just like that? This become that ex that leaves you than as soon as you find that piece of happiness they have to some how ruin because they aren’t happy and if they aren’t happy you can’t be happy either. This is where you end up feeling stagnant it looks like everyone around is happy and moving on with their lives and you are just standing by the dustbin with a dustpan in your hand deciding whether to throw it all away or keep it all…

We never realise that starting all over is a way of making progress or promoting ourselves and as we move up there are things that fall or break off because they aren’t ment to move up with us, look at it like a fruit tree the more it grows the more pruning it has to get in order to bear more fruit, same with us when you start all over you have to get rid of certain things to make way for new ones. So when starting a fresh make sure you get rid of all the excess baggage, a new life doesn’t need things from the past hindering it from success

This isn’t a gender based issue. 

We all have fallen victim of it. 

We’ve all vowed that it would never happen to us but…. It did. 

It really is easy to judge and speak about how it’s done real damage to people until we ourselves go through it. 

Sad part is it leaves us with a whole lot of questions and we end up questioning our own judgement.

So why does it happen, how does it happen, is there even a way to see or sense that it’s happening?

Why do we let relationships, no the person we are in a relationship with change, control and consume us?

I mean we keep “preaching” this thing to everyone one around us especially to young women, “Don’t let your partner know that they are the BE ALL and END ALL in your life or else you’re screwed!” and yet we as the “preacher” do exactly what we said shouldn’t be done and in most cases truth be told as much as I hate saying it, it is women who do this. I don’t know if it’s a curse or we are just stubborn sometimes or we think we are immune to our own advise, I don’t know, what I know is that most of the time women are the ones who change for their partners, women give their partners all the control and women are the one that give their entire being to their partners so they can consume it. And no female can deny this fact, it is a sad and horrible one but it is the truth. There have been many strong, driven, successful women we know that have gone into a relationship and changed total they become weak and insecure women who seek approval from their partners, they only do things that their partners “allow” them to do. All of a sudden everything they work so hard for doesn’t matter anymore because what, because why, because who? 
Are we that insecure that we feel like we need to downgrade ourselves in every way possible just to keep that one person who doesn’t add shit to our lives? Is our thinking so backward that we have to forget who we are and ensure that our partners are the ones who are moving forward and succeeding? 

But like I said in the beginning this isn’t a gender based issue even though it happens mostly with women we can say that man also have the same issue. You find a man who is strong, secure of himself and hard working who will enter into a relationship and they become desperate, over compensating slaves to their partners, they will literally jump head over hills, leaving everything just for their partner who who only calls when they need something… 
Til when? 

Til when are we going to let these people have this effect on us?

Woman start realising your worth. Know that if you have to sacrifice something that is a vital  part of you then they weren’t worthy of ruling your Kingdom with you. Never and I mean never downgrade yourself for someone who doesn’t add value to your life matter of face dint downgrade yourself for anyone at all your life is all about none stop progress!

Man if you ever have to go unreasonably above and beyond for someone who can’t even be there at you lowest then it’s time to cut your losses. Realise that being a man is more than just a title, it is hard work and the sooner you realise that the sooner you’ll find you the support structure for your foundation. Never become anyone’s slave and work towards making progress everyday of your life.

Let’s stop this involuntary change.

I choose me.

I am done. I have chosen me over everything and anyone else. I am taking back what’s mine and I’m gonna be selfish with myself. I’m over the disrespect, constant pleading to be love back, the giving without expecting anything. I’m over it, I’m over everything. I have no fight left in me I have nothing more to give I’m to gonna beg any more. The buck stops right here im no longer seek your approval coz it means nothing now, I know my worth of and you aren’t even worth my time, I have sooooo much to give but not to just any and everyone. I pick me. I choose my happiness. I select my life first.
I come first so no more bullshit, tears no more pain, no more heartache, no more
giving freely. I am finished, I am not about that life anymore. It’s my time now. I’m doing what makes me happy, I’m wearing sexy underwear for me I am dressing like a millionaire for me. I am falling in love with myself first.

A request from me made by me.

I’m sick of it! I’m tired of your constant crying. You’ve become so unbearable. It’s like I don’t know you anymore. Sad part is I can’t get away from you and find someone better because I’m stuck with you till death do us part….

You know I’ve known all your life, I raised and moulded you to be the person you are today and don’t get the appreciation I deserve. I was there on first break up, matter of fact I was the one who told he’s not the right one but hey what did I know I was just stuck inside you to know what’s best for you. Let me not even go to that story with the “best friend” who had your back because I told you there was something shady about that girl yet you still didn’t listen. I’ve basically been the voice of wisdom that you clearly ignore, I told the truth even when you refuse to hear it.
Ok maybe there were times you listened and I was wrong. I did say never give up on love and you’ve had your heart broken multiple times, but hey it made you stronger and a tad bit crazy. And there was that time I said you need take a leap of faith… yea you leaped and landed on your face, that made you stronger too and a little off balance…. But hey I can admit to the  couple of times I was wrong so shoot me for not being human but being part of one which means I’m incline to make mistakes which technically means it still isn’t my fault.

But that’s not the point…. The point I’m making here is to tell you to LOVE ME… And you must wondering who me is… I’m your voice of reason, your internal punching bag, the one person who’s loved you throughout all your weird and wonderful stages if life, I am your legit day 1, your ride or die.
I am you. And I just wanted to make a request to you: 

Love yourself first, don’t be so hard on yourself you’ve accomplished way more than you think. Remember days aren’t the same so allow yourself to go through the emotions. Don’t shy away from love even when it hurts because it brings you a step closer to the on made for you. Forgive everyone that hurt you in any way but also ask for forgiveness from those you hurt. Laugh as much as you can, find joy in all things you do and keep smiling. Remember you are a masterpiece that’s perfectly imperfect 
Love you always and for ever You.

Her journey begins…

When I look in the mirror.

I see the same old girl,

The dull face girl that’s just plain and boring,

I see a useless waste of energy. 

Insecure unworthy damsel.

A tramp!

Everyday I look in the mirror…

I die a little every time.

I see  the disgusting figure I called ME!

I see a stranger staring back at me

I feel the eyes of judgement tear me apart one chrge at a time.

I hear tormenting laughs of my estranged evil self.

The daily remind of feeling mediocre every time I looked at my reflection 

Having first learnt to say I hate myself before I knew what it meant… 

just by looking in the mirror.
Today I looked in the mirror…
For the first time I saw something different,

I saw her…

I felt her  beautiful soul,

Full of life with so much to offer.

I saw a fire ignite in my eyes,

I found a new passion within myself.

I reconciled with myself.

I looked in the mirror 

And….

I fell in love with who I saw.

I fell in love with the new feeling I gave myself.

I fell in love with my entire being.

When I looked in the mirror 

I saw the queen I was ment to be.