She’s done 

You know she’s done when doesn’t do the things she used to do for you

You know she’s done when me doesn’t put in the same effort as before
You know she’s done when she doesn’t worry or fuss about you anymore
You know she’s done when on your bullshit doesn’t even faze her
You don’t call, she’s ok with that…
You don’t text, she doesn’t even panic any more…
She silently pulled away from you and you didn’t notice 
And you know you’re fucked when your threats to leave make her smile….
That’s when you know she’s done for good.

It’s the life we live…

You’ve had your heart broken.

You’ve had your life torn apart.

You lost everything.

You lost everyone.

Your entire being was turned upside down 

Through it all you held your head up high and kept going.

You tried to pick up the pieces

You tried to put it back together 

You looked for everything 

You searched for everyone 

You entire being is still stuck in turmoil

Through it all you realised, “fuck it”

Your heart got broken, yes… And it isn’t the the first nor the last there’s nothing special or different about the ex, the didn’t realise that they had a gold mine on their hands so forget about it.

Your life is torn apart, so what? Has there ever been a life that’s all in one piece, I don’t think so, so gather all the pieces and ensure they are all in one place I mean you don’t need your shit all over the place right…

You lost everything… Maybe you weren’t suppose to have it. Look at it this way stop focusing on what you have and start looking at what you can do its not like you going to be buried with your things once you dead.

You lost everyone… No no no! Everyone lost you, they couldn’t handle awesomeness so find people who can, you’re not gonna be everyone’s cup of tea.

Your entire being is turned upside down and… Who know which way is the right way up even your being could be positioned the right way the only thing you should worry about is your entire being being at peace through all the turmoil. 

Screw everything, keep your head up, own your throne and grow your Kingdom that’s all that matters 

Throw it away 

Starting all over is never easy but it is necessary and I don’t mean picking up the broken pieces and putting them back together. A fresh start means taking the dustpan sweeping up all the pieces even the ones that look like you can fix and throwing it all away in the dustbin. Reason why specifically say “throw it all away in the dust” is because we tend to hold on to things unnecessarily, yes we want a fresh start but the thought of starting everything all over or even letting go of old grudges and emotions creates this fear of, “what will I fill this space with now?” We somehow create this panic within ourselves where it seem like if we get rid of these pieces we instantly lose our identities, we simply don’t know who we are without these pieces. Or better yet we are able sweep up the pieces but we throw it under the rug…. That still does nothing you because you might say you got rid of it but you know where that extra junk in your trunk comes from sad part is it ways you down. That dirt under the rug is like being in a toxic relationship you know you have to get out because you deserve better of but you don’t want to and it ends up damaging you way beyond repair or worse it kills you all because of that fear of stepping out on your own and starting a fresh. But here’s the worst of the bunch the ones who sweep up everything and I mean everything make their way to the dustbin but don’t get rid of the dirt or they do get rid of it but the won’t leave…. I don’t know how but there is a sense of guilt that falls upon us at this point where it seem like we seem to be betraying ourselves by throwing away the very same pieces that were once part of us, how do you just throw such away just like that? This become that ex that leaves you than as soon as you find that piece of happiness they have to some how ruin because they aren’t happy and if they aren’t happy you can’t be happy either. This is where you end up feeling stagnant it looks like everyone around is happy and moving on with their lives and you are just standing by the dustbin with a dustpan in your hand deciding whether to throw it all away or keep it all…

We never realise that starting all over is a way of making progress or promoting ourselves and as we move up there are things that fall or break off because they aren’t ment to move up with us, look at it like a fruit tree the more it grows the more pruning it has to get in order to bear more fruit, same with us when you start all over you have to get rid of certain things to make way for new ones. So when starting a fresh make sure you get rid of all the excess baggage, a new life doesn’t need things from the past hindering it from success

Stop it!

Stop lying to yourself.

Stop convincing yourself that they will change.

Stop giving them countless chances to do better.

Just STOP!

You’ve heard all the excuses,

You’ve dealt with the betrayal,

You’ve been through the sleepless night of convincing yourself that things will be better.

You have been through the entire cycle, bought the t-shirt, wore the t-shirt till it faded and bought a new one again.

So STOP!

The only thing that will change is their looks and not even for the better.

The only thing that will get better are the excuse for you to take them back.

You gonna drive yourself crazy by having more sleepless nights lying to yourself so you can feel better.

There was life before they came into the picture,

Life continued even when they were around,

And guess what?

Life still continues without them.
Do yourself a favour and put a stop to it

Save yourself and say no

Get your peace of mind back and just block their ass.

Most importantly look at for number one (YOU)

Let go!

Letting go is very easy to speak about, so easy that we offer it as a piece of advice to anyone and everyone but the act is far harder to do… 
Think about it two very simple yet powerful words that have great effect on one’s life, “let go” rolls off the tongue so smoothly but can’t roll off your mind or heart without almost getting you to an emergency room… It isn’t as easy as we say it is to others.
We tend to look at letting go as a way of forgetting all the memories, milestones and achievements we’ve had hence it’s so hard to do. But letting go also symbolises growth, a sign of being ready to move on and space that’s been created for more memories,  achievements and milestones in one’s life.
Letting go isn’t about forgetting what you’ve been through but showing that what you’ve been through has made you a better person.

So let shit go!

#queeningonmyownterms

A letter to him

The last 2 months I’ve learnt a lot about myself. I realised I can’t stay angry no matter how much I try, I’ve learnt to embrace my insecurities and to fall in love with myself all over again the greatest impact so far on me is finding myself in Christ again. I’ve let go of everything and just started all over. I don’t regret anything about us, I am actually grateful it all happened otherwise I wouldn’t have been where I am and if someone asked me if I would do it again I’d say yes. I’m not fully over you matter of fact I won’t get over you but I am moving on and seeking joy for myself, like I said in the text messages and everything I am about my life now and all I want is piece of mind. It still hurts not know what happened and why it did but I don’t cry as much any, it doesn’t really hurt anymore and look at your jacket everyday doesn’t break me anymoreI am happy by myself because I prayed about it and I prayed for you. I’m still worried about and I do miss you I hope you’re ok.

our moments of brokenness always pass through the hands of our good and faithful heavenly Father.

Romans 8:18